May 10, 7:12AM
Moving On: There I was face to face, Talking To Myself. I was overcome with mixed emotions. Excited. Embarrassed. Saddened. Alive. Then, I caught a spark.
Clarity: Perfect is like desire in that it only seeks itself. It is never complete, and because it is never complete it is imperfect. So it seeks. That's the only thing it can do. It seeks to be more complete, but ruins the body and mind at the same time. It creates greatness and the accompanying lows, filled with anxiety and restlessness. It never acknowledges its mistakes, and because it doesn't it digs deeper.
The irony is that like desire, perfect is never honest, which, along with courage, are two of the most important qualities to have. Like an immature love, it doesn't understand how to move slow, or to grow by taking the long-road. It creates pressure, and in the process makes itself more difficult to obtain. It's a fleeting image, and the phrase "I wish I could." It's always a step behind, and the exclamation, "It's never enough." It's the missing embrace that haunts you, leaving you vacant and searching.
Seeing Through: When projected it expects instead of accepts, and builds tension instead of understanding. It hides, conceals and moves just beyond reach. So you spend an entire lifetime reaching, reaching, and reaching for something that cannot be held. At the same time, it places the same out-of-reach expectations on another.
The truth: She's got an edge. I've got that edge too.